Do you know? Are you already doing what you want to be doing? Or are you like me and you don't have a clue what you should be. I would love to know what I could be good at. I'm strong in math and yet when I look at careers in that field, I think they would make me go mad. SLOWLY. I like working on computers, but I don't want to sit at one all day. I think I could be a great teacher, but the pay just totally sucks in NC. And I really hate to admit that money would have a factor in what I do, but damn it. I don't want to work my ass off and get paid change. I'm considering something in the health field right now. Both Physical therapy and diet/nutrition consultant sound like good possibilities. I want to have a career that I feel proud of. I want to help people. I don't want to be behind a desk all day. But most importantly, I want to be happy and look forward to work. After all, I will be giving up being a homemaker to do this.
How did you figure out what you wanted to be? Was it something you knew from an early age? I always thought I would end up in the computer programming field. And in fact was only 3 semesters from a BS degree when I became pregnant with my 1st. Now almost 8 years later, I think that I could not stand doing programming all day. But at the time, I was SURE that was the best choice for me. However, that was before I had kids and responsibilities that were far more important than just myself or money.
I'm taking some time to go by the library and check out some books on career & personality tests that may help me decide what will be a good fit for me. I'm really hoping that this will give me some good feedback to work with. I am quite literally scared to death to make a wrong decision. I don't want to spend the rest of my life doing something that I hate. Again, I want to be happy.
I'll update soon about what choices I'm going to go for!
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Sunday, August 12, 2007
An 'off' year
2007 is definitely an off year for the hubby and I. We seem to just not be able to get in sync this year. We're quick tempered with each other. We're irritable and cranky. I know that sometimes I look at him and wonder how I'm going to live the rest of my life with him. He's got to be thinking the exact same thing. How could he not? I'm not exactly the easiest person to live with.
Lately, it just seems like we can't seem to agree on anything. If I like something, he doesn't. If he likes something, I probably won't. However, we've racked up several thousand dollars in debt so we must be agreeing on something. We did manage to plan and book a vacation. Incredible. We'll probably fight about where we're going to eat when we get there though. ;)
I sometimes wonder if we're just growing apart. I hear it happening so often with couples. But then I think, I can clearly remember having off years before. And many very good years mixed with some average nothing special years. So, maybe I'll just chalk this one up to being the lemon that has to come every so often. In the meantime, I need to go and nag about the honey do list that is many months (and years) behind. Might as well do that while we're already aggravated with each other. I'll post soon with the honey do's that are grossly over due. Some are funny and some are just sad. And of course, I'll show the projects that he HAS done lately just to keep things even.
Lately, it just seems like we can't seem to agree on anything. If I like something, he doesn't. If he likes something, I probably won't. However, we've racked up several thousand dollars in debt so we must be agreeing on something. We did manage to plan and book a vacation. Incredible. We'll probably fight about where we're going to eat when we get there though. ;)
I sometimes wonder if we're just growing apart. I hear it happening so often with couples. But then I think, I can clearly remember having off years before. And many very good years mixed with some average nothing special years. So, maybe I'll just chalk this one up to being the lemon that has to come every so often. In the meantime, I need to go and nag about the honey do list that is many months (and years) behind. Might as well do that while we're already aggravated with each other. I'll post soon with the honey do's that are grossly over due. Some are funny and some are just sad. And of course, I'll show the projects that he HAS done lately just to keep things even.
Monday, August 6, 2007
What are you crazy about?
For me, it's music and theme parks. Combine the two and I'm in heaven. I can't remember a time when the two were not something I craved. I love music because it helps me express and feel emotions that are hard for me. I love the thrill of roller coasters because it's makes me feel reckless and brave (even though I am neither.) I think that's what life is all about. You are who you are and you find things that let you stretch your wings. I love the rush of it all.
Some of my earliest memories are going to Disney with my Mom & Dad. They both loved to ride coasters too and so I developed a passion for them at an early age. It was so much fun to have 2 parents who were fun loving then. For when I was still a teenager my Mom was struck with a brain tumor. And needless to say, anything fast or adventurous was a thing of the past for her. She wanted to though. I remember her getting on a fair ride after she was diagnosed only to get violently sick from the momentum. She was embarrassed and I'm sure frustrated that it affected her that way.
I think one of the reasons I still crave these rides is that they remind me of a simple time in my childhood. One in which I had no problems. One in which my family was healthy and whole. Only now, I have a husband (who hates these ride btw) and 3 kids. Luckily my oldest is already showing a passion for coasters. When we went to Disney back in April, he & I rode the Everest ride 3 times in 2 hours. lol. I am taking him to Kings Dominion for his birthday in Sept. I can hardly wait myself.
Music is very much the same as coasters for me. It comforts me & excites me at the same time. There are time when I hear a song that I burst in tears and my throat closes in. Other times, it's a nostalgia about events that took place when I first heard a song. I love music passionately.
My first concert was Night Ranger and The Outfield. Both were good bands, but even then I knew Night Ranger had something special. Sure enough, it was just a few months later that "Sister Christian" came on the radio. I always think back to how fun that first concert was. And amazingly enough I took all 3 of my kids to see Night Ranger last weekend in Raleigh. How often can you take your kids to see a band you first saw when you were a teenager? My oldest enjoyed it so much. We're already planning another concert in a few weeks.
I'm looking forward to growing up with my kids and continuing to do these things I'm passionate about. I'm lucky that they are embracing these things with me.
What are you and your family passionate about?
Some of my earliest memories are going to Disney with my Mom & Dad. They both loved to ride coasters too and so I developed a passion for them at an early age. It was so much fun to have 2 parents who were fun loving then. For when I was still a teenager my Mom was struck with a brain tumor. And needless to say, anything fast or adventurous was a thing of the past for her. She wanted to though. I remember her getting on a fair ride after she was diagnosed only to get violently sick from the momentum. She was embarrassed and I'm sure frustrated that it affected her that way.
I think one of the reasons I still crave these rides is that they remind me of a simple time in my childhood. One in which I had no problems. One in which my family was healthy and whole. Only now, I have a husband (who hates these ride btw) and 3 kids. Luckily my oldest is already showing a passion for coasters. When we went to Disney back in April, he & I rode the Everest ride 3 times in 2 hours. lol. I am taking him to Kings Dominion for his birthday in Sept. I can hardly wait myself.
Music is very much the same as coasters for me. It comforts me & excites me at the same time. There are time when I hear a song that I burst in tears and my throat closes in. Other times, it's a nostalgia about events that took place when I first heard a song. I love music passionately.
My first concert was Night Ranger and The Outfield. Both were good bands, but even then I knew Night Ranger had something special. Sure enough, it was just a few months later that "Sister Christian" came on the radio. I always think back to how fun that first concert was. And amazingly enough I took all 3 of my kids to see Night Ranger last weekend in Raleigh. How often can you take your kids to see a band you first saw when you were a teenager? My oldest enjoyed it so much. We're already planning another concert in a few weeks.
I'm looking forward to growing up with my kids and continuing to do these things I'm passionate about. I'm lucky that they are embracing these things with me.
What are you and your family passionate about?
Saturday, August 4, 2007
Not only was it NOT special, it was miserable
What am I talking about? My 14th Anniversary. It was the worst one ever. I mean that sincerely. You've already read my other post about what hubby 'wanted' to do that day. Well, all I can say is that I would have been better off if he had done that. Because he made damn sure that the day sucked for me.
What did I do for him? Well, I went out and got a funny card (because we just don't do the mushy stuff.) I spent freaking $20 on a sampler Cheesecake Factory cheesecake. He comes home and says. "Are doing anything?" Uh Yeah. Are we not going to dinner? So, we head off to Carrabas (again) because when I mentioned a day or two earlier that Japanese would be nice. He responds, "well, they kind of pissed me off the last time." Ok. Whatever. Off to Carrabas.. again. Did I mention again? It was a fairly decent meal. As nice as it can be with ALL FREAKING 3 kids with us. Ugh.. because you know nothing says romance like bringing the whole damn crew. Anyhow, we get through the meal and go home. I bring out the card and the cake. The kids are thrilled to get cheesecake on top of dinner, but he acts indifferent. There was no card for me. Nothing. He did mumble something about "happy 14." Don't confuse this with a heartfelt "Happy Anniversary". It literally was a ho hum 'happy 14.'
It gets better. WAY better. *insert sarcasm* We actually started fighting. Fighting! Of all the stupid, idiotic things. He starts a fight on our freaking anniversary. About what? You many ask. Cars. "HUH?" Cars. We fought about cars, or specifically new cars (that we don't even own, I may add.) He jumped all over me for (get this *gasp*) giving my opinion on a car that was a possibility in about a year or two. Ok, so I know that it wasn't 'really' about the car. But WTF? He just completely ruined the day over something this ridiculous.
The next day, he starts off by smarting off at me and I just freaking go ballistic on him. I mean full on screaming at the top of my lungs with tears streaming down my face. He says "I didn't mean for things to come out like that." Well, it sure is hard to interpret them any other way. He genuinely apologized and did the customary grovel for a bit. I'm trying hard not to feel bitter, but I am just so disappointed how what should have been our special day turned out. At least he did say he was sorry. I do know he meant it. He only apologizes when he knows he was wrong. He's a very head strong man.
What did I do for him? Well, I went out and got a funny card (because we just don't do the mushy stuff.) I spent freaking $20 on a sampler Cheesecake Factory cheesecake. He comes home and says. "Are doing anything?" Uh Yeah. Are we not going to dinner? So, we head off to Carrabas (again) because when I mentioned a day or two earlier that Japanese would be nice. He responds, "well, they kind of pissed me off the last time." Ok. Whatever. Off to Carrabas.. again. Did I mention again? It was a fairly decent meal. As nice as it can be with ALL FREAKING 3 kids with us. Ugh.. because you know nothing says romance like bringing the whole damn crew. Anyhow, we get through the meal and go home. I bring out the card and the cake. The kids are thrilled to get cheesecake on top of dinner, but he acts indifferent. There was no card for me. Nothing. He did mumble something about "happy 14." Don't confuse this with a heartfelt "Happy Anniversary". It literally was a ho hum 'happy 14.'
It gets better. WAY better. *insert sarcasm* We actually started fighting. Fighting! Of all the stupid, idiotic things. He starts a fight on our freaking anniversary. About what? You many ask. Cars. "HUH?" Cars. We fought about cars, or specifically new cars (that we don't even own, I may add.) He jumped all over me for (get this *gasp*) giving my opinion on a car that was a possibility in about a year or two. Ok, so I know that it wasn't 'really' about the car. But WTF? He just completely ruined the day over something this ridiculous.
The next day, he starts off by smarting off at me and I just freaking go ballistic on him. I mean full on screaming at the top of my lungs with tears streaming down my face. He says "I didn't mean for things to come out like that." Well, it sure is hard to interpret them any other way. He genuinely apologized and did the customary grovel for a bit. I'm trying hard not to feel bitter, but I am just so disappointed how what should have been our special day turned out. At least he did say he was sorry. I do know he meant it. He only apologizes when he knows he was wrong. He's a very head strong man.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Environment-abilities
What are you doing for the environment. Or maybe a better question would be what are you doing to hurt it? I've found that I do a little of both. But I probably hurt it more than help it. I'm not willing to only take a 5 min shower. I can't even do my basic shaving maintenance in that time frame. I did however, replace most of the bulb in my house with the energy efficient ones. We don't water our lawn. Poor thing, it looks hideous. But it just has to wait on Mother Nature. The hubby drives '98 Honda Civic with 300,000 miles on it that still gets 33 mpg in the city! I drive a GAS GUZZLING Honda Odyssey that doesn't even get the 22 mpg that was stated on the sticker when we bought it. It's more like 15 mpg in the city. Ridiculous!!!
Actually that really pisses me off. Because like many others, we really do have a need for the van since we have 3 kids in carseats. ** For those who question this... go get 3 carseats. Make 2 of them a "5 pt harness" (the kind with the internal harness) and 1 of them a "BPB - Belt Positioning Booster" (the kind that uses the lap & shoulder belt of the car). Now, go make them fit in the backseat of your car. It's not as easy as it seems like it would be. For the most part, sedans do not easily accomodate this. Which is why you see so many vans and SUV's on the road. We were able to achieve it with our 2002 Passat Wagon. But it was tight. Plus, we had to take two cars whenever when went on vacation with the dogs or when my niece & nephew come to stay for a week.
Getting back to the van though. When we decided to buy a van, we test drove and looked at MPG ratings of different makes. We loved the Honda and it had a MPG rating on the sticker that we could live with. But then we actually owned it and got NO WHERE NEAR what the sticker stated. We were furious. But like thousands of other drives, there was nothing we could do short of selling it. That left us back to square one. BTW... we later found out that pretty much every van and suv on the market has a MPG rating sticker that never comes close to what it claims. Buyer beware and note that you will pay more for gas that what you are led tobelieve.
So, we drive our gas guzzling van because we really don't have many other options. Strike 1 against the environment. I try to balance this by not driving often. At home, I conserve energy like crazy. I never leave lights turned on. I have my thermostat set to 79 in the dead of summer. I keep the ceiling fans on to make sure the air is constantly circulated. I only run the dishwasher when it's full. I have it on the water miser setting. I turn my computers off at night. I no longer leave my cell phone charger plugged in. I do laundry in large loads to conserve water. I also took the plunge and got a front loading washer that uses SO much less water. Again.. we don't water the lawns (unless it's been weeks since we've had rain.) I recycle as much as I can. Our local municipality only recycles pastics with the code from 1-3. You'd be surprised how many things are labled as 4-7. I still have a tendency to throw paper in the trash instead of setting it aside to go in the recycling bin. I still have a long ways to go. Including the shower. But the point is, I'm trying.
I came across a great short film about trying to congress to mandate cleaner running cars and clean fuels. It's quite a funny and comical way of getting the point across. At the end, there is a petition. If you are moved at all, sign the petition. I did.
http://www.cleanmyride.org/
Actually that really pisses me off. Because like many others, we really do have a need for the van since we have 3 kids in carseats. ** For those who question this... go get 3 carseats. Make 2 of them a "5 pt harness" (the kind with the internal harness) and 1 of them a "BPB - Belt Positioning Booster" (the kind that uses the lap & shoulder belt of the car). Now, go make them fit in the backseat of your car. It's not as easy as it seems like it would be. For the most part, sedans do not easily accomodate this. Which is why you see so many vans and SUV's on the road. We were able to achieve it with our 2002 Passat Wagon. But it was tight. Plus, we had to take two cars whenever when went on vacation with the dogs or when my niece & nephew come to stay for a week.
Getting back to the van though. When we decided to buy a van, we test drove and looked at MPG ratings of different makes. We loved the Honda and it had a MPG rating on the sticker that we could live with. But then we actually owned it and got NO WHERE NEAR what the sticker stated. We were furious. But like thousands of other drives, there was nothing we could do short of selling it. That left us back to square one. BTW... we later found out that pretty much every van and suv on the market has a MPG rating sticker that never comes close to what it claims. Buyer beware and note that you will pay more for gas that what you are led tobelieve.
So, we drive our gas guzzling van because we really don't have many other options. Strike 1 against the environment. I try to balance this by not driving often. At home, I conserve energy like crazy. I never leave lights turned on. I have my thermostat set to 79 in the dead of summer. I keep the ceiling fans on to make sure the air is constantly circulated. I only run the dishwasher when it's full. I have it on the water miser setting. I turn my computers off at night. I no longer leave my cell phone charger plugged in. I do laundry in large loads to conserve water. I also took the plunge and got a front loading washer that uses SO much less water. Again.. we don't water the lawns (unless it's been weeks since we've had rain.) I recycle as much as I can. Our local municipality only recycles pastics with the code from 1-3. You'd be surprised how many things are labled as 4-7. I still have a tendency to throw paper in the trash instead of setting it aside to go in the recycling bin. I still have a long ways to go. Including the shower. But the point is, I'm trying.
I came across a great short film about trying to congress to mandate cleaner running cars and clean fuels. It's quite a funny and comical way of getting the point across. At the end, there is a petition. If you are moved at all, sign the petition. I did.
http://www.cleanmyride.org/
Friday, July 27, 2007
Apparently 14 is NOT special...
I'm not happy with the hubby. Tuesday, July 31st will be our 14th anniversary. I made the comment last night about how it's just around the corner. He laughs and responds "heh.. I may not even be here for it". Excuse me? WTF? What do you mean you may not be here for it. He tells me he had been considering going to a bike race that evening. Well, it's Thursday and I'm just now hearing this. Needless to say, I am hurt and let's face it, pissed. I think he figured out very quickly that I was angry, because he quickly decided that he would stay home and we would go out to dinner. But the mere fact that he simply doesn't understand why it would upset me just floors me. I just don't get it. You'd think after 14 years he'd know that you don't go off for a 'bike race' on your wedding anniversary.
Now.. before you start mentally bashing me. You need to know that I am an extremely supportive wife. The hubby is an avid road bike rider/racer and we actually do a lot of traveling to support this hobby of his. He is gone 2 evenings during the work week and both mornings on the weekend to train. I never give him a hard time about this. It's just part of his training and fitness regimen. What I do expect however is for him to let me know what he has planned out in advance. It's only fair that since I'm dealing with 3 kids while he's gone during that time that I know exactly when he'll be gone. I don't appreciate being left out of the loop and then being expected to just go along. I'm supportive but I will never be a push over. You would think that he would realize that announcing this last minute would be a dangerous course. Add that to the fact that it's our anniversary and he is really treading on thin ground.
Am I asking too much? I really don't think so. 14 years is special to me. But apparently it isn't to him.
Now.. before you start mentally bashing me. You need to know that I am an extremely supportive wife. The hubby is an avid road bike rider/racer and we actually do a lot of traveling to support this hobby of his. He is gone 2 evenings during the work week and both mornings on the weekend to train. I never give him a hard time about this. It's just part of his training and fitness regimen. What I do expect however is for him to let me know what he has planned out in advance. It's only fair that since I'm dealing with 3 kids while he's gone during that time that I know exactly when he'll be gone. I don't appreciate being left out of the loop and then being expected to just go along. I'm supportive but I will never be a push over. You would think that he would realize that announcing this last minute would be a dangerous course. Add that to the fact that it's our anniversary and he is really treading on thin ground.
Am I asking too much? I really don't think so. 14 years is special to me. But apparently it isn't to him.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
A weighted issue
It's that time of the month for me. I'm pissy and moody today. I really just want to punch something, but there's not anything to take my frustrations out on. I'm bloated and irritable. So, what better day to talk about weight issues.
I am what you would call a 'big boned' girl. Even if I didn't have a single ounce of fat on me (ha! fat chance!), I would still be less than slim. I have broad shoulders and 'birthing hips'. Which is quite ironic since I ended up with 3 cesareans. The bottom line is I'm not a skinny girl. But I am an active person. I've just recently started going to a local fitness center where I do strength training 3- 4 times a week. Before that I walked 3 miles a day for several years through hilly terain. However, it just wasn't taking any pounds off. I mentioned earlier that I have had 3 cesareans. Believe me they do a number on your abdomin and I'm tired of carrying this extra weight around.
I've come to the conclusion that I needed to step up the action. I'm now doing interval training on an eliptical or treadmill. I'm doing the strength training. I'm swimming with the kids several times a week. I'm seeing some positive results. But that damned ab area just isn't going away. I've already decided to controversal action about it. Once I have lost all the weight I can, I will elect to have a tummy tuck.
I'm sure that many of you will think this is the easy route out of my problems. Let me assure you that it is not. In fact, the mere thought of recovering from this procedure scares the living shit out of me. However, there is really no other option for the problem I have. You see, I have what is commonly known as 'twin skin'. My oldest child was born at almost 41 weeks. He was well cooked. He was also 11 lbs 1 oz and 23 1/2 inches long. The average baby is 7.5 lbs and about 20 - 21 inches long. The average size "twin" is a little over 5 lbs. My son alone in the womb weighed more than a set of twins together. I also had excessive amniotic fluid. When I went in for delivery, I measure roughly the size of a woman who was 44 weeks along. Consider that for a moment. A full term pregnancy is 38-40 weeks. I was huge. I did not have gestational diabetes. No one really knows why I deliverd such a large baby. But one thing was for sure. My abdomen would never recover. The skin is forever damaged. It is stretched beyond what it could heal. It stretched, bled, stretched, cracked and bled some more to accomodate my child. The last few weeks were so painful for me. I was grateful when it was over.
Since that time, I went on to have 2 more beautiful children. And I don't regret for a moment what child birth has done to my body. But I am selfish enough to say that I want to now fix with surgery what I can't do on my own.
So, what are your thoughts on any of these topics? Did you get your pre-pregnancy body back? Are you still fighting the battle of the extra bulge? Would you consider plastic surgery to fix things you cannot achieve with weight loss? Please note that I am not talking about Lipo. I honestly do not care to do this. I know that I can lose any extra pounds I have by simply continuing to exercise. However, would YOU consider Lipo? Have any of you had any of these procedures already? If so, let us know your experiences.
I am what you would call a 'big boned' girl. Even if I didn't have a single ounce of fat on me (ha! fat chance!), I would still be less than slim. I have broad shoulders and 'birthing hips'. Which is quite ironic since I ended up with 3 cesareans. The bottom line is I'm not a skinny girl. But I am an active person. I've just recently started going to a local fitness center where I do strength training 3- 4 times a week. Before that I walked 3 miles a day for several years through hilly terain. However, it just wasn't taking any pounds off. I mentioned earlier that I have had 3 cesareans. Believe me they do a number on your abdomin and I'm tired of carrying this extra weight around.
I've come to the conclusion that I needed to step up the action. I'm now doing interval training on an eliptical or treadmill. I'm doing the strength training. I'm swimming with the kids several times a week. I'm seeing some positive results. But that damned ab area just isn't going away. I've already decided to controversal action about it. Once I have lost all the weight I can, I will elect to have a tummy tuck.
I'm sure that many of you will think this is the easy route out of my problems. Let me assure you that it is not. In fact, the mere thought of recovering from this procedure scares the living shit out of me. However, there is really no other option for the problem I have. You see, I have what is commonly known as 'twin skin'. My oldest child was born at almost 41 weeks. He was well cooked. He was also 11 lbs 1 oz and 23 1/2 inches long. The average baby is 7.5 lbs and about 20 - 21 inches long. The average size "twin" is a little over 5 lbs. My son alone in the womb weighed more than a set of twins together. I also had excessive amniotic fluid. When I went in for delivery, I measure roughly the size of a woman who was 44 weeks along. Consider that for a moment. A full term pregnancy is 38-40 weeks. I was huge. I did not have gestational diabetes. No one really knows why I deliverd such a large baby. But one thing was for sure. My abdomen would never recover. The skin is forever damaged. It is stretched beyond what it could heal. It stretched, bled, stretched, cracked and bled some more to accomodate my child. The last few weeks were so painful for me. I was grateful when it was over.
Since that time, I went on to have 2 more beautiful children. And I don't regret for a moment what child birth has done to my body. But I am selfish enough to say that I want to now fix with surgery what I can't do on my own.
So, what are your thoughts on any of these topics? Did you get your pre-pregnancy body back? Are you still fighting the battle of the extra bulge? Would you consider plastic surgery to fix things you cannot achieve with weight loss? Please note that I am not talking about Lipo. I honestly do not care to do this. I know that I can lose any extra pounds I have by simply continuing to exercise. However, would YOU consider Lipo? Have any of you had any of these procedures already? If so, let us know your experiences.
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